You've heard of Liv & Maddie? I think those are their names anyway. It's a Disney Channel sitcom with twins that are total opposites. One is glamorous with all sorts of aspirations and is the president of every club in school, while the other glasses wearing twin is the sporty one who is opposed to all things glamorous. A modern day Mary Kate & Ashley situation, you might say. And OH WHAT AN IMPACT.
She immediately identified with the sporty twin and decided she would be sporty and pour herself into soccer. It was a major change because this was the child who grew up in dresses and matching everything by choice. A flipped switch. Suddenly, she's the best player on the field. She went from uninterested and going through the motions to MVP.
What REALLY made the difference? Was it Liv and Maddie? No. It was her decision to be the best. Her decision that being sporty and being good at it would be ultimately rewarding ... that's what made all the difference.
The power of thought is more powerful than any of us really understand. To expand on that, I've had lengthy conversations with loved ones recently about the decisions of others and the habits of others that impact us. I grew up in a divorced family so I figured out really quickly how to find the best in both arguments. One thing I think we fail to consider is that the actions of others, although they may directly impact us, are not always done in malice toward us. What I mean is best described in a hypothetical situation. Let's say I have a roommate and we share a bathroom. Every day and every night, I brush my teeth at the same time. Not knowing that my teeth brushing time in the morning is making her late to work because she is having to wait on me to finish and at night it's making her late to go to bed which in turn makes her wake up later in the morning ... making her even later leaving the house. Maybe that sounds crazy, but it works for this argument. After a few days of adapting to each other, I'm struggling with changing my teeth brushing time and she has a decision to make. She can either be patient while I adjust, or she can let her blood boil and think that I'm just doing all this to make her mad. Your response to others can change the outcome of situations or arguments. We all have habits and things that are difficult to change. And while habits are difficult to break, sometimes all the other person needs is to see you trying to help accommodate them.
So today's message is this: the way you choose to think about things can drastically change your life and everything in it. When you choose to step outside yourself and consider the reason for the decisions of others, you're not only making moves to come to a mutual decision ... you're showing love in a whole new way. Maybe you're working through a disagreement. Maybe there's someone who makes decisions you don't understand at work or in your circle of friends. Consider the origin of their thought process. Maybe they have a hard time managing several friends at a time and it doesn't mean that they don't love you, but they get overwhelmed when there's too much information in front of them. Maybe in their last job, they were expected to make certain decisions in certain ways and it's deeply ingrained within them to do certain things. Please understand, this isn't a message that presents the argument that you should "bow out" or be a push over. It is a call for consideration. Consider where decisions and reasoning patterns originate, and use what you've discovered to help you come to a fair rebuttal that isn't combative. Love overcomes everything.
Also: my mother spent the night with me last night. We shopped today and bought a new rug for my living room. While she was here she discovered that I am apparently OCD. "You have things a little perfect in here, don't you?" I had no idea. I just really enjoy organization and I think it's good for my soul to bring every room to "ready" when I leave it so that I don't have to fix it later. OCD may be a strong term, since it is a medical diagnosis and all, but I discovered something new. Over the past year, living by myself in a whole new town miles away from loved ones, I've changed and morphed into the Ryn that RYN is comfortable with. You see, I'm a pleaser. I try to make decisions that please others. It's wonderful and debilitating at the same time. Part of the growth that I've experienced is that I've come to the realization that while I can try to please people all day long, people aren't always going to reciprocate. And that's okay. Also ok? Being unapologetically yourself even when it isn't appeasing to others. Not that my overly organized home would be unpleasing to others ... but if it was, I would owe no one an explanation. It isn't a defensive stance that I take on this, it's more of a comfort in your own skin that we all deserve to have. No one in my family in Tuscaloosa ever expected me to be something that I didn't think represented my soul, but this move has given me the opportunity to really get to know who I am. I'm still working on it, but God has shown me so much in such a short time.
Discover who you are. Decide who you want to be, and go be the best you that you can. You were created with a specific purpose. Live it out loud. Decide who you want to be and go be it. And if need be, buy yourself some glasses.
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